Ashley is Naturally Glamorous!

Ashley of SoSaidAshley

When did you decide to go natural? Why? 

I decided to go natural April 1st (I know, I know. Yes, they did think it was an April Fools joke when I announced it to everyone). I did it for personal and medical reasons. The personal being the fact that I had seen that whole "soda-can-in-relaxer" portion of "Good Hair" and I was just tired of sitting hours with a relaxer on my head, just so it would "lay down for once".

Then, the medical being that I have chronic migraines and I would always stress myself out before getting a relaxer (because, as I mentioned, I often sat with it on for several hours at a time), so, my stressing would give me migraines, and, afterwards, for a few weeks, the chemicals would react badly with my body and cause even worse migraines.

I just finally decided I had enough.

Did you big chop or transition? How did you manage your hair while going natural? 

I transitioned. Well, I'm still transitioning. There was just something about me with short hair that I didn't like; my mother, grandmother and great-grandmother have always looked great with short hair, but, it was short because they kept it that way. 

As for me? I just wasn't comfortable making such a drastic change.

I'm managing my hair being sure to keep the two textures blended - without doing that, breakage is going to happen, for sure.(And, as I said in my first post on my blog, breakage is not something I'm playing with). I like to keep the textures blended by making my relaxed ends more texturized. I've never been able to maintain truly straight hair with chemicals, so, now that I'm transitioning, I'm not even going to bother trying with heat.

When did you BC?  What was your initial reaction to your natural hair? 

In terms of "BC'ing" with transitioning, I haven't officially done so yet. I did cut off a large part of my hair in the back that's purely natural, so, I have a good idea of what my texture looks like, and, from what I can see, I love it. I haven't been hesitant, at all, in typing it (it's easier for me to take care of if I have a general idea of the type and thus some ways I can look up how to care for it), so, I'd say it's about 4b/4c (which I fully believe exists). 

How did your family and friends react to the new you?  What was your response to them?  

They didn't react well. I grew up with "Good Hair Syndrome", so, they were always used to seeing my hair straight - Well, my hair is still, for the most part, straight. They weren't used to seeing all of my new growth and hearing me honestly say that, no, I was not getting a relaxer anymore. And, no, you could not pay for it. I got picked on, from adults and kids alike, friends and family alike, but, they don't understand it, so...

My response was just to tell them it was my head of hair and they didn't have to like it. It wasn't that I couldn't afford a relaxer or that someone said something mean about me getting relaxers - I just didn't feel comfortable getting them anymore and I wasn't going to, whether they liked it or not.

What does this journey mean to you? 

This journey means... A lot to me. I don't want to say something "cliche" like "Oh, this means finally stepping out from the bonds of the societal 'norms' and being myself!", but, I feel like, sort of, that's what it means. This means finally getting to honestly say "I am not my hair" and live like it. I've cut out a large section out of the back of my hair, I'm wearing my new growth and not trying to hide it... This finally means I can get over the whispering of my peers and do what I want to with myself and be confident in it.

What is your daily regimen? 

Unfortunately, I don't have one just yet. Well, my "rough draft" of a regimen is being sure to wet with water and seal with castor oil when I wake up, and put it in a protective style (typically a large, french braid crown, now that I've learned how to do them).

What products do you currently use, and how are they working for you? 

Motions! I know, I know, it's kind of been a hands-off product (it's got 'cones and sulfates, right?), but, it's doing wonders for my hair. In addition to just throwing in some castor oil and EVOO in my spray bottle with my water. It's kind of a running joke on my blog that I'm broke, so, no big, pricey things for me.

What have you learned throughout your journey?

I have learned that people will talk. It's inevitable; and especially since I'm a high school student. My peers don't understand. And, what they don't understand, they fear - it's different. And, what they fear, they hate and make fun. It's a pretty natural response, and, I've learned that anyone not making comments that'll help me improve in my journey or as a person... They just aren't worth listening to.

Any advice for others on their journey?

You have got to have an attitude. That's not suggesting you be rude or cocky; there shouldn't be room in your person for those types of attitudes. But, you can't just go into this just doing it. You've got to have an attitude and a mindset that says "No matter what they say, I'm going to be the bigger person, answer their questions in an educated manner and not go off when they make ignorant comments". Because, they will. You just have to have a strong attitude and be prepared. Not everyone is going to be supportive.